Does your sponsor trust you enough for this?

“I don’t see it that way, but I trust your judgment. Go ahead.”

How often have you heard that?

I’ll be dead honest with you: I can probably count it on one hand.

Disagree and commit.

A couple of weeks ago, we spoke about decision-making and Amazon’s concept of 1-way versus 2-way doors. (You can read that newsletter here).

There’s something in there that I overlooked...

You see, two-way doors are reversible decisions.

That means you can take them fast, and often by a single person or small group. But even reversible decisions often need buy-in from some stakeholders. And that’s where it all unravels…

First, everyone and their dog has an opinion.

And once you think you have all your ducks in a row, your sponsor finally replies and has a “great idea”…

And before you know it, there’s a committee of 20 deciding on the color of a button (true story).

We’ve all been there. And while some stakeholder friction is healthy, most project leaders don’t even consider they have another option.

Disagree and commit.

Picture yourself disagreeing with someone on your team about a technical decision. Let’s say they’ve been building these kinds of systems for two decades, and you can’t even read their code.

They explain why they think path A is better than path B, but you’re not sure.

Does that mean that you need to have it your way?

I doubt it, but that’s what most people default to. After all, you’re the project manager, and you take ownership of your decisions.

What would it take for you to disagree and continue on the path they propose?

I bet you’ve done this in the past, but you’ve also been in situations where you went with your gut.

Think about it for a second - what was the difference between the two situations? We’ll get back to that one in a minute.

First, back to your decision where you need your sponsor’s OK.

The catch is this: the more senior someone is, the more they default to having it their way.

Which is perfectly normal…

They made it to certain positions in part because they’ve proven that they made good decisions in the past. A CEO makes big bucks because they make big decisions with big consequences.

But that doesn’t mean they always need to have it their way.

Now, I hear you thinking…

“Sure, but you have not met my sponsor yet”

True. It’s probably the most stubborn person in the world.

But I’ve met a couple hundred over the past decade.

Trust me on this: most of them don’t even realize that disagreeing and committing is a viable option.

So what can you do with this?

The first thing is obvious: you can tell them. But before it’s considered a feasible option, you need trust.

A person will never commit to something they disagree with if they don’t trust the other party.

So how do you build trust?

It all starts with stakeholder management. With taking the lead. With showing you’re in control. But there’s more to it…

I wrote a deep dive on building trust in teams a while ago, using a framework I learned during a project with McKinsey. Fascinating stuff. You can read it here.

If there’s enough trust, give it a shot.

Make it part of the conversation around decision-making. Plant the seed. You now have the language for it.

Have a healthy debate about the different options, but have everyone commit to the way forward. Whether they agree or not.

One team, one voice.

And if there’s no trust, well…

Then you have bigger issues than just this decision. Work on establishing that first. Fix the relationship with your sponsor, and watch your project flourish.

Because even if they’re ultimately accountable for the project, that doesn’t mean that it has to be done their way.

It means they need to feel heard, be part of the process, and commit to the next step.

Whether they agree or not.

Talk soon,
Jasper

PS: and that technical decision with your team member? I bet you’ve realized the difference between the two scenarios by now. Trust.